June 17, 2014
A close friend has had a rough go of it of late. My mom recently had dinner with her.
“I’ve come to a conclusion,” my friend told her. “I can’t save the world right now. Right now, all I can do is save myself.”
Me, too. I think we both grew up believing we would go out and make the world better. I know I long ago determined that I could only save my little corner of the world. You know the saying: Be the change you want to see in the world. My corner has gotten small. It currently consists of me. I know it will grow again. That it will become easier to reach out to those around me. To create in my small little corner the sort of community that I wish the world could be. To live the change.
But not right now.
“She’s just as fragile as you are,” my mom said.
I don’t think that’s a word that either of us ever would have thought we’d ascribe to ourselves. I’m not fragile. I’m strong. I’m unbreakable.
Except I’m not.
P.S. It’s day 27. It was around this time last cycle that I was spotting. So far, so good. It’s been incredibly hard not to take a home test the past few days. I’m trying to hold off until at least Thursday. That’s two more days. Less than that. I’m still scared my period will start tomorrow. But if it doesn’t, I think chances will be good that this IUI was successful.