Not So Happy

September 12, 2014

Today has been, quite frankly, rough.  I expected as much.  A year ago today, my daughter was still alive.  A year ago today, I went into labor.  A year ago today was filled with joyous anticipation that would all too soon be dashed.  I spent most of the morning crying.  Not sobbing.  Just crying.  No wailing.  Just tears.  Maybe this will make it so that I sleep better tonight.  I’m not counting on it, but it would be nice.  The past few nights I’ve spent mostly awake but too tired to open my eyes.  Hopefully tonight won’t be another like that.  We’ll see how it goes.

There are a few things, though, that have made me smile.

  1. Courtney brought me chocolate cake this morning.  And then she went back to whoever had brought it in and brought me more chocolate cake this afternoon.  Chocolate is the cure for dementors, after all.
  2. I looked up self-care for pubic symphysis diastasis.  It’s been particularly sore this pregnancy.  One of the recommendations was a “rice sock”.  Now, why would I make a rice sock when I have perfectly good rice bags already made?  I’m currently sitting with on of them between my legs, and the heat most definitely seems to be helping.  Thanks, Internets!
  3. Someone remade the DuckTales theme song using real ducks.  Because they could.
  4. I follow multiple NPR journalists on Facebook.  Not one, but two of their foreign correspondents shared the link to this story about a Dutch student who faked a trip to Asia.  Deborah Amos commented that NPR could save so much money if they followed suit.  Frank Langfitt insisted that he’s been faking his foreign travels for years.
  5. Oh, and when I start crying uncontrollably, there’s that little part of my brain (you know the part that narrates your life?) that can’t help but think “The tears are running down her ears.”  Thanks, Spike Jones.  If you don’t get the reference, do yourself a favor and follow the link.  Yes, it’s almost 13 minutes long, but trust me, it’s worth it.  (Yes, in looking up a link for it, I’ve left it playing so that I can enjoy the entire piece.)
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